Chapter 22 Anything I Can't Let Go of, Must Be Something I Can't Have (Zhou Xiaochen Extra Story)
Zhou Xiaochen walked through the corridor of the hospital, the handcuffs on her hands were covered up at her the detention center, she got the news that her mother was seriously ill. She wrote an application, and with the help of Su Yuanan, she was approved to see her seriously ill mother.
Pushing open the door of the ward, she walked towards the mother on the bed was very quiet, as if she was Xiaochen leaned against her mother's pillow, she was so close that her eyelashes could be her memory, her mother's eyelashes seemed to have always been so moist, with tears dripping down at any time.
"I'm sorry for you." Su Yuanan said behind him.
Zhou Xiaochen raised his head and looked directly at Su fact, it was the first time for her to see Su Yuan'an at such a close distance. This man who has been in her mind and memory for more than 20 years is actually very strange. She looked at him and smiled coldly: "Yes, you are the one who is sorry for me. You know? When the kids laugh at me for jumping out of rocks, I miss you standing beside me and helping me beat those guys; It's a contemptuous face; when my mother is sick, I want you to take her to the hospital... But you have never done this. "
"But I didn't know she had you." Su Yuan'an said apologetically, "If I knew, I would definitely not ignore you. Your mother has always been very stubborn. Even if I talked to her about the divorce conditions, she didn't confide in me. More than half a word."
After venting, Zhou Xiaochen didn't speak, she just quietly looked at her mother on the hospital bed.
"My relationship with your mother has never been good. When I came to work in Engang, I was already discussing divorce with your mother, so I am not a person who abandons his wife and daughter." Su Yuanan said sadly, "If I know, I won't get a divorce, but she is too stubborn, since I filed for divorce, she is not going to tell me about having you, she always puts herself on the moral high ground like this."
Mother's stubbornness Zhou Xiaochen has always known that if she hadn't been stubborn, the mother and daughter might not be alive 's just why my mother has been unwilling to tell Su Yuan'an the truth, Zhou Xiaochen thought of a sentence-whatever I can't let go of, I can't have it.
For so many years, my mother has been unable to let go of her hatred for Su Yuan'an, because she can't have Su Yuan'an's love, so she morbidly grafted this hatred onto her.
She remembered the years in elementary school, when her class held a parent-teacher meeting, it was always her mother who a classmate in the class asked her: "Zhou Xiaochen, why isn't your father here?"
She made up a lie and said, "My dad is on a business trip."
The mother standing next to her slapped her and pointed at her nose: "Where did you get your father? Remember, you don't have a father."
At that time, the classmate clapped his hands and said with a smile: "Zhou Xiaochen, so you don't have a father, so you, like Monkey King, jumped out of a rock?"
And her mother didn't say a word for her, but left with a cold always remembered that scene, and she always remembered her mother's indifferent expression. At that time, she thought that all she needed was for her mother to be silent and not expose her lies.
Another time, she didn't get in the exam. It was a snowy day, and her mother threw her in the snow to make her knelt in the snow, her legs were already other families in the yard were cooking, and she was hungry and smelled the grandmother next door saw that she was pitiful and wanted to pull her up, but the mother poured cold water over her: "Do you think you are Miss Qianjin? If you don't study hard, how will you make a living in the future? Your father loves you so much. Who blames your father?" I don’t want you, if I don’t want you, you won’t survive in this world now, and if you don’t live up to your expectations, you won’t have anything to eat.”
That day, she knelt there with her whole body wet, feeling nothing at all, her whole body was already numb in the was the neighbor's grandma who couldn't stand it anymore and took her back to her night, she developed a high fever, but the next day, after her fever subsided a little, her mother threw her into the school, and coldly tapped her nose: "I want to pretend to be sick and rest, There are no doors."
There is no other mother in this world who can be so resolute. Later, she thought, it was probably her mother's resoluteness that made her feel hatred, so she thought in her heart from then on, as long as she had a chance, she would not let that man named Su Yuanan It's easy for a man, she wants to put all the childhood ruined by him on him to get it , she brought her sick mother all the way to Engang and lived around Su Mei like a shadow, doing so many bad doing so much, she was just jealous of Su Mei's childhood, youth, and her father's blind date , she only planned to take revenge on Su Yuan'an, but later, she extended her hand of revenge to Su fact, she is as pitiful as her mother, because she can't have it, so she can't let it go.
Su Yuan'an looked at the silent Zhou Xiaochen, he really wanted to reach out and touch this daughter, but he didn't have the courage in the end, the whole world couldn't pay back what he owed withdrew his hand and said softly: "Xiaochen, don't worry, I will take care of your mother for you, and I will also find a lawyer to apply for a commutation of your sentence. You have to behave well yourself, and wait for you to come out later." , let me make it up to you."
"It's your duty to take care of her." Zhou Xiaochen tidied up her mother's hair and the quilt, "You should pay back what you owe her these years. As for me, you have never owed her anything." What about me, because you don’t even know that there is someone like me in the world, so what can you owe me?” After tidying up for his mother, Zhou Xiaochen bid farewell to his mother, and walked out calmly following the police.
Su Mei stood outside the ward, saw the corner of her mouth move, but finally said nothing.
Su Yuan'an stood behind her blankly. Zhou Xiaochen, who had walked to the gate of the hospital, suddenly turned around. She smiled weakly at Su Yuan'an. She actually wanted to tell Su Yuan'an that she didn't hate him that much anymore.
In the police car, Zhou Xiaochen thought calmly, if she got married and gave birth to a child, even if her husband betrayed her, she must raise the child strong and independent, and not talk about her father in the child's ear. bad in her memory, the word "father" was terribly frozen, and it all came from another person's thought of a story she bought with money on Taobao. The girl in the story said, because the road ahead is long, I can’t carry a dead body for thousands of miles.
For so many years, she was the child who carried the dead body for thousands of miles, but now, she wanted to let go.
Maybe she wanted to let go a long time ago, as early as the day Su Mei and Song Wenqi had an accident, the morning when she wrote an anonymous letter to report herself and President Ning, she wanted to let go.
(End of this chapter)
Zhou Xiaochen walked through the corridor of the hospital, the handcuffs on her hands were covered up at her the detention center, she got the news that her mother was seriously ill. She wrote an application, and with the help of Su Yuanan, she was approved to see her seriously ill mother.
Pushing open the door of the ward, she walked towards the mother on the bed was very quiet, as if she was Xiaochen leaned against her mother's pillow, she was so close that her eyelashes could be her memory, her mother's eyelashes seemed to have always been so moist, with tears dripping down at any time.
"I'm sorry for you." Su Yuanan said behind him.
Zhou Xiaochen raised his head and looked directly at Su fact, it was the first time for her to see Su Yuan'an at such a close distance. This man who has been in her mind and memory for more than 20 years is actually very strange. She looked at him and smiled coldly: "Yes, you are the one who is sorry for me. You know? When the kids laugh at me for jumping out of rocks, I miss you standing beside me and helping me beat those guys; It's a contemptuous face; when my mother is sick, I want you to take her to the hospital... But you have never done this. "
"But I didn't know she had you." Su Yuan'an said apologetically, "If I knew, I would definitely not ignore you. Your mother has always been very stubborn. Even if I talked to her about the divorce conditions, she didn't confide in me. More than half a word."
After venting, Zhou Xiaochen didn't speak, she just quietly looked at her mother on the hospital bed.
"My relationship with your mother has never been good. When I came to work in Engang, I was already discussing divorce with your mother, so I am not a person who abandons his wife and daughter." Su Yuanan said sadly, "If I know, I won't get a divorce, but she is too stubborn, since I filed for divorce, she is not going to tell me about having you, she always puts herself on the moral high ground like this."
Mother's stubbornness Zhou Xiaochen has always known that if she hadn't been stubborn, the mother and daughter might not be alive 's just why my mother has been unwilling to tell Su Yuan'an the truth, Zhou Xiaochen thought of a sentence-whatever I can't let go of, I can't have it.
For so many years, my mother has been unable to let go of her hatred for Su Yuan'an, because she can't have Su Yuan'an's love, so she morbidly grafted this hatred onto her.
She remembered the years in elementary school, when her class held a parent-teacher meeting, it was always her mother who a classmate in the class asked her: "Zhou Xiaochen, why isn't your father here?"
She made up a lie and said, "My dad is on a business trip."
The mother standing next to her slapped her and pointed at her nose: "Where did you get your father? Remember, you don't have a father."
At that time, the classmate clapped his hands and said with a smile: "Zhou Xiaochen, so you don't have a father, so you, like Monkey King, jumped out of a rock?"
And her mother didn't say a word for her, but left with a cold always remembered that scene, and she always remembered her mother's indifferent expression. At that time, she thought that all she needed was for her mother to be silent and not expose her lies.
Another time, she didn't get in the exam. It was a snowy day, and her mother threw her in the snow to make her knelt in the snow, her legs were already other families in the yard were cooking, and she was hungry and smelled the grandmother next door saw that she was pitiful and wanted to pull her up, but the mother poured cold water over her: "Do you think you are Miss Qianjin? If you don't study hard, how will you make a living in the future? Your father loves you so much. Who blames your father?" I don’t want you, if I don’t want you, you won’t survive in this world now, and if you don’t live up to your expectations, you won’t have anything to eat.”
That day, she knelt there with her whole body wet, feeling nothing at all, her whole body was already numb in the was the neighbor's grandma who couldn't stand it anymore and took her back to her night, she developed a high fever, but the next day, after her fever subsided a little, her mother threw her into the school, and coldly tapped her nose: "I want to pretend to be sick and rest, There are no doors."
There is no other mother in this world who can be so resolute. Later, she thought, it was probably her mother's resoluteness that made her feel hatred, so she thought in her heart from then on, as long as she had a chance, she would not let that man named Su Yuanan It's easy for a man, she wants to put all the childhood ruined by him on him to get it , she brought her sick mother all the way to Engang and lived around Su Mei like a shadow, doing so many bad doing so much, she was just jealous of Su Mei's childhood, youth, and her father's blind date , she only planned to take revenge on Su Yuan'an, but later, she extended her hand of revenge to Su fact, she is as pitiful as her mother, because she can't have it, so she can't let it go.
Su Yuan'an looked at the silent Zhou Xiaochen, he really wanted to reach out and touch this daughter, but he didn't have the courage in the end, the whole world couldn't pay back what he owed withdrew his hand and said softly: "Xiaochen, don't worry, I will take care of your mother for you, and I will also find a lawyer to apply for a commutation of your sentence. You have to behave well yourself, and wait for you to come out later." , let me make it up to you."
"It's your duty to take care of her." Zhou Xiaochen tidied up her mother's hair and the quilt, "You should pay back what you owe her these years. As for me, you have never owed her anything." What about me, because you don’t even know that there is someone like me in the world, so what can you owe me?” After tidying up for his mother, Zhou Xiaochen bid farewell to his mother, and walked out calmly following the police.
Su Mei stood outside the ward, saw the corner of her mouth move, but finally said nothing.
Su Yuan'an stood behind her blankly. Zhou Xiaochen, who had walked to the gate of the hospital, suddenly turned around. She smiled weakly at Su Yuan'an. She actually wanted to tell Su Yuan'an that she didn't hate him that much anymore.
In the police car, Zhou Xiaochen thought calmly, if she got married and gave birth to a child, even if her husband betrayed her, she must raise the child strong and independent, and not talk about her father in the child's ear. bad in her memory, the word "father" was terribly frozen, and it all came from another person's thought of a story she bought with money on Taobao. The girl in the story said, because the road ahead is long, I can’t carry a dead body for thousands of miles.
For so many years, she was the child who carried the dead body for thousands of miles, but now, she wanted to let go.
Maybe she wanted to let go a long time ago, as early as the day Su Mei and Song Wenqi had an accident, the morning when she wrote an anonymous letter to report herself and President Ning, she wanted to let go.
(End of this chapter)
